the rest. But I will, by getting some sleep tonight, and getting
outside tomorrow and hiking or running or something.
It is very clostrophobic here. My sister is sleeping in the studio,
which has a door, and I'm sleeping in the den, which does not. I can
hear the tv going in mother's room, and there is maniacal screaming
which adds to my feeling of being in a strange but disturbingly
familiar place.
A place where my mental formations once grew, like stalagtites and
stalagmites, layer by layer, forming an intricate mave in the caverns
of the silver mine I used to explore. I knew there was a place where
the cave opened again to the surface. A cuople of times I could see
sunlight coming through an opening in the distace, but I could never
get through to it because the dark, muddy water was too deep
I will put my headphones on and create my own world.
The music, Max 404, drawing pictures, memories, dancing in the dark,
when past was present. Now the past is a dream, and the present is
fading into a dream.
Under the draft of a cooling duct, sweating in my sleeping bag,
windows shut.
